Transcript: Horsefulness Training podcast-episode 8

Title: Should You Be Your Horse’s Leader? The Truth About Leadership in Horse Training

Date: 07-04-25

Host: Karine Vandenborre

Hello and welcome to the Horsefulness Training podcast. I'm Karine Vandenborre, a professional horse trainer, instructor, and the founder of Horsefulness Training. In episode number six, I talked about the myth, Be your Horse's Leader. If you haven't heard that episode, I recommend starting there, because today, we're diving into the second common myth that can harm your relationship and training with your horse.

And that myth is: if you want to be your horse's leader, you need to be higher in rank.

Now, this belief comes from the idea that horses have a strict hierarchy where the leader is always the highest ranked. But that is simply not true. While there may be moments where a certain order exists, there's no fixed ranking system among horses. The horse that takes the lead at any given time is not always the highest in rank. And as I've mentioned before, any horse can take the lead depending on the situation. So if there's no fixed hierarchy, the idea that a leading horse is always the highest in rank just doesn't hold up. Because in reality, leadership in a herd isn't about rank—it's about the group making decisions together.

So if most horses choose to follow a certain horse, that's what happens. That's what the group then will do. If they don't, it doesn't happen. So there is not just one leading mare, and the idea that being higher in rank makes you the leader simply isn't true. Hierarchy and leadership are two different concepts that I want you to understand.

But many trainers, instructors, or fellow horse trainers will tell you, “Show your horse you're higher in rank, and then you'll become the leader.” This belief is so common. But if you want to be a mindful and effective horse trainer, it's important to let go of that myth. You need to separate leadership from hierarchy.

For example, if a certain horse takes another horse's spot in the herd, you could say that that horse shows himself dominant over the other at that moment. But that doesn't mean he's demonstrating good leadership—because showing dominance and leading a horse is not the same thing.

So how do you show good leadership? Well, it's all about self-confidence, calmness, and trust. Your horse needs to choose to follow your guidance. They need to trust your guidance about where you're going together and what you're doing.

And to achieve this, you first need to build trust. And this isn't done through dominance-based exercises, but through friendship, mindfulness, and connection. And that's why in Horsefulness Training, we always start with bonding time. This is the first thing that my students and the participants of my online programs learn from me. Bonding time is what they do for the first weeks with their horse.

And this is truly key because bonding time lays the foundation for a deep connection and trust with your horse. It's truly the foundation. Because without trust, your horse won't follow your guidance. He won't follow your lead because he chooses to—he will follow your lead because he's afraid of you if you use dominance-based approaches.

But you want him to follow you in your decisions because he chooses you, because he likes to be with you, because he feels safe with you. It's as simple as that.

So many of my students who start bonding time wonder if it will really make the difference that I promise—because it is simple. But within just a few days sometimes they’re already emailing me or telling me that they are amazed by the results, not just in their horses, but in themselves as well.

Because bonding time—the practice of it—isn't only about building trust with your horse. It's also about finding your own calm inside. So alongside trust, you also need to show natural calmness and confidence. And during the practice of bonding time, that's also what you are doing. You're practicing calmness. And you are gaining more confidence.

It's almost like a form of meditation, while at the same time, it's also the most powerful and natural way to bond with a horse—because that is also how horses bond in nature: by spending time together.

So next to trust and calmness at liberty—because bonding time is the first connection exercise at liberty—you also need trust, calmness, and confidence during groundwork. And even when riding. Because when you ride, you also want to be able to show good and calm leadership. You want the horse to follow your lead.

So when you have these two: strong trust and calm confidence—your horse will willingly start following your lead because he chooses to, because he wants to.

So instead of thinking, I want to be my horse's leader, so I need to show him who's higher in rank, the truth is actually: If you want to lead your horse well, develop a strong bond and deep trust first, and stay calm and confident.

If you want to experience this for yourself, I'd be honored to help you build a natural connection. I'll guide you step by step in becoming that calm, confident partner your horse needs—using mindful training that aligns with their natural behavior and communication. And if you want to take the first steps towards that, then I warmly invite you to my free training. You can find the link in the show notes.

I hope you enjoyed this episode on myth number two. In the next episode, we'll explore myth number three: My Horse is Dominant.

In the meantime, enjoy time with your horse, and I hope to welcome you in the free training.

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