Transcript: Horsefulness Training podcast-episode 6

Title: Horse training myth #1 - "Be your horse's leader"

Date: 18-10-23

Host: Karine Vandenborre

Hello and welcome to the Horsefulness Training Podcast. I'm Karine Vandenborre. I'm a professional horse trainer and instructor, founder of Horsefulness Training, and creator of the online Horsefulness Training Programs.

In this episode of the Horsefulness Training Podcast, I'm going to discuss one of the five most common myths that affect the connection with your horse and the training of your horse in a negative way.

Are you ready?

One of the things that I've learned about horse owners in my professional career is that every horse owner dreams of a true connection with their horse, and everybody wants to be able to train their horses with success.

But in reality, I have seen the opposite a lot. I see a lot of horses that show dominant or defensive behavior, horses that are anxious, that mistrust people, horses with traumas, and horses who are shutting down. And a lot of horsewomen really feel bad about that. They experience negative feelings and emotions. Think about doubt, fear, frustration, lack of confidence.

Now, one of the reasons that horsewomen encounter problems with their horse is often lack of knowledge and insight, plus miscommunication.

And that's why it's so important that you learn to understand your horse and his nature and how you can communicate clearly. Then you will have a happy horse, and you will be able to keep his spirit alive. Your horse will be able to be who he is by nature. He will also have trust in the human world, in you, and in the training you offer him.

Now, to be able to do that, you first need to understand that there are still some myths and misconceptions in the horse world that have a negative influence on the relationship with your horse and his training. These beliefs, these myths, are still very common today, even among famous horse trainers. That’s why I made this new five-part podcast for you. In each episode, I will debunk one myth.

Today, I'll discuss the first one: the myth that says, "Be your horse's leader."

People assume that in a group of horses, there's always one leading mare who leads the group, and that all the other horses always follow her directly in what she decides or does.

However, research shows that every member of the group can take the lead. So, there is no single leading mare who decides everything all the time. The group basically makes decisions together.

If the majority of horses in the group chooses to follow a certain horse who decides to do something, then this is what will happen: the whole group will follow eventually. If the majority decides not to follow, then the group won’t follow.

And also, a stallion, for example, can take the lead. So it's not true that it's always a mare who takes the lead.

In the documentary "Cloud", about wild Mustangs, you can see how the stallion decides at a certain point to leave and walks ahead to the water hole, and the mares follow him. So it's not always a mare that leads the group.

What is true is that certain horses, especially older mares, are followed more in their decisions than others. You could call these mares the "leading mares." They are often older, experienced, and apparently radiate more leadership in some situations. They are also very calm, confident, friendly, and assertive. Because they radiate that leadership, they are more easily followed, other horses learn they make great decisions.

But, as I already said, that’s not always the case.

Now, what does this mean for the human-horse relationship? Because that is very important.

If we are together with our horse, we are also a kind of herd. So what does it mean that there is not always one leader in a herd?

This means for you that it is not possible to be the ultimate leader of your horse. Your horse doesn't see you that way. It doesn’t see you as his ultimate leader who he will follow everywhere, no matter what happens, and without thinking, like a reflex. Because that is actually what the myth says: that if you're your horse's leader, your horse will follow you no matter what and without thinking.

But that is not true at all.

Every time, your horse will reconsider whether he will follow your lead in a certain situation or not.

That’s also what I have experienced in my work as a professional horse trainer for already 30 years.

So, you're basically a herd of two. And this means the majority doesn't count, because there is no majority. It's either you who takes the lead in the situation, or it's your horse.

Your horse is the one who decides whether to follow you or not.

So, you are not the ultimate leader. No. It means you have to be aware of that.

But it also means that you can practice becoming confident and showing strong leadership in difficult situations, but it still doesn’t make you the ultimate leader.

Therefore, in my lessons, teachings, and workshops, you will never hear me say, "Be your horse's leader." I almost never talk about being a leader or a leader figure.

I just say: Give your horse good guidance. I prefer to talk in terms like that, show good leading qualities instead of “be the leader.”

So it's important that you can show this. That you can give confident guidance to your horse, so that your horse wants to follow your lead when needed.

And it’s important that you show no doubt. You do this by showing calmness, confidence, and being friendly and assertive.

What else does this mean for your connection and relationship with your horse?

It means that there can be moments where you let your horse lead as well, where you follow his speed and direction. This is about letting your horse choose and make decisions, just like in a real group of horses.

During Liberty Connection work, which I teach my students (and which I also have an online program about), but also in groundwork and even when riding, we can alternate between taking the lead and giving the lead to the horse.

And just because you sometimes let your horse take the lead, that doesn’t mean you can’t take it back again. It’s all about communication and knowing what to do in the right moment.

That’s what I wanted to explain to you in this episode.

So: don’t believe the myth that says, “Be your horse’s leader,” because it’s simply not true. It’s not possible.

It’s all about communication, guidance, and setting yourself up in such a way that you can offer calm guidance, show what you want, and communicate that to your horse. Then it’s up to the horse to respond, to make a decision. And then you can respond again. It’s like a dance, a communication dance.

And if you’d like my help, just let me know. You can reach me at info@horsefulnesstraining.com, or have a look at my website to find out more about my work and online programs: horsefulnesstraining.com.

Okay, that’s it for now. Thank you for listening to this episode about myth number one.

In the next episode, I’ll discuss myth number two:
“If you want to be your horse’s leader, be higher in rank.”
Yes, that one you can ditch as well.

I encourage you to subscribe to iTunes or your favorite podcast service, and please leave your comments and reviews. That way, you too can help spread the Horsefulness Training philosophy.

Thanks again for being here, and as always, keep the following important message in mind:

Care for your horse, connect with your horse, and make a difference in your horse’s life — because your horse only lives once, and you’re the one who can make sure it’s worth it.

© Karine Vandenborre - Horsefulness Training.  All Rights Reserved